


Once Upon A Time, I Didn't Give A Damn

by axumun



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: High School, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-07
Updated: 2011-05-07
Packaged: 2017-10-19 03:31:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/196395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/axumun/pseuds/axumun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Watching Matt's face soften into a fond, friendly smile, Adam doesn't feel small anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Once Upon A Time, I Didn't Give A Damn

**Author's Note:**

> For a glam_kink prompt: High school: Adam has the same birthday as MC. Adam is awkward, fat, strange. MC is popular, good-looking, perfect. Adam's b-day parties have 1 friend attending if he's lucky unless he moves it to different day than MC's. MC has entire school at his. (He invites Adam, too.) Adam both resents and worships him. Fast forward 10 years. Adam is now ADAM. One day he runs into MC. What happens?
> 
> I think I put a little spin on the prompt, but I hope it's okay. :)

Adam stares hard at his reflection, as if he's expecting it to magically change before his eyes. He wants to look away, but he won't. This isn't about looking; it's about _seeing_ what isn't there, what he really wants and needs to find. Something's missing, and he's determined to find it.

Pressing a fingertip to his temple, brushing through ginger hair, Adam gives up on looking. He closes his eyes, and pictures _him_ : light brown hair that falls in a wispy fringe around big, chcolate brown eyes; pale skin, not a single freckle; nice clothes; good grades and a likeable personality.

And a birthday, the same day as his own.

Sometimes, Adam thinks that boy must be his better half - or maybe his evil twin; it depends on the day. Adam wouldn't have a chance at holding his own party. No one with a social life would come. He's got a couple of people in mind that would agree to attend if he asked really nicely, but it doesn't feel worth it.

After a few more hard looks at the mirror, Adam walks away. He's done enough thinking.

*

"What do you want for your birthday?"

Nervously sliding vegetables around on his plate with his fork, Adam tries to kep his gaze down. He can't meet his mother's eyes; not like this.

"I don't know. I'll think about it." Before his mom can respond, he adds, "Would you mind if I visited a friend's house that day? We have the same birthday."

"Sure, honey. Who's your friend?"

Adam swallows, takes in a big gulp of air, and finally bllurts out, "Matthew Laurent."

"Oh."

Adam pretends not to hear the surprise in his mother's tone. He almost hears her unspoken question: _He's your friend_? _?_ Technically, he is and he isn't. Matthew is one of those guys who's everyone's friend, whether he likes you or not. He treats everyone the same. It's just, there are people who take up more of his free time and space in his heart, and Adam longs to be one of _those_ people.

Trouble is, those people are all the perfect, popular ones. Some are snotty, just hanging over Matthew's arm for attention, and some are kind; mostly brainy, athletic types with bright futures and had colleges fighting over them.

Matthew never liked the attention, but he always appreciated it. Adam liked that he never took advantage of it; that he was always willing to let the people standing in his shadow shine. Adam couldn't wait until that day came for _him_.

 _If_ it ever came.

*

It's no shock that Adam gets an invitation to Matthew's party. Pretty much everyone had gotten an invitation. Adam's heard stories about Matthew's house, but had never actually seen it before. They say it's definitely big enough to fit the whole school if they all decide to come.

Once he's actually there, he can't take his eyes off the place. The house isn't a house at all; it's more like a mansion, with windows that seem to reach to the sky, fancy double-doors and a stone patio surrounded by colorful flower gardens, big trees and shrubs, teeming with wildlife. It blows his mind to think that the inside could be even _more_ grand.

Matthew greets everyone at the door by name. He knows everyone; knows everything that matters to them. He asks about sports, family, pets; whatever he can before they dwell further into the depths of this... _palace_. It might as well be one.

When Adam gets closer to Matthew, who's holding his front door open, he notices something strange about him. While everyone's dressed up in their best skirts and suits, shiny new wardrobes with expensive shoes and accessories, Matthew is wearing a T-shirt and a pair of old-looking jeans. He looks so simple, _plain_ , even, moreso than Adam's ever seen him. More _beautiful_ than he's ever seen him.

The thought almost scares him.

Adam's not wearing anything _really_ fancy; just some nice looking pants and a clean shirt. He thinks about how much of an idiot he looks around all these other people, who are standing around complimenting each other's shoes while he self-conciously tries pulling the pantleg bottoms of his own jeans over old and worn Nikes.

His heart stops when he realizes Matthew is talking to him.

"Hey, Adam." He offers that heart-melting half-smile and holds out a hand to shake Adam's. Adam knows that Matthew has said "Hey, _insert name here_ " to everyone who's come to the door, but he feels special somehow when Matthew says his name; like, for a moment, he's the only one in the world.

Holding out his own hand, Adam manages a feeble, "Hi, Matthew."

"Call me Matt," he returns. "Everyone does."

That's when Adam's heart _really_ stops, because when Matthew - Matt - includes you as everyone, he at least considers you _someone_ , and somehow, the thought alone is comforting.

Once everyone makes it inside, Matt gets up on what looks like a stage - but is most likely a big landing at the top of a staircase - in the middle of the darkened lobby, lit only by cleverly-placed laser pointers and a little sunlight sneaking in through the tall windows.

Adam doesn't really know what to do. Some people are helping themselves to various finger foods and beverages or socializing, but he doesn't feel like doing either one. He stands in a corner and waves to people who happen to notice him and say hello.

Matt now holds a microphone, and whistles into it to test it out. It works, all right - _everyone_ stops whatever the fuck they're doing - whether they're in the middle of a sentence or their third cup of punch - and listens.

"Hi everyone. Thanks for coming. Um, there's something I forgot to say."

Adam, like the other dozens of people around him, becomes dangerously curious.

"It's someone else's birthday today," Matt finally says, and Adam's heart jumps.

He's called up to the 'stage', hiding a grin worthy of the Cheshire Cat, and feels strangely small looking down at his peers. Most of them despise him with a passion for one reason or another, and none of those reasons are valid ones at all. Others think he's nice, but they make up only a small handful of faces in the crowd. There are also other's he doesn't know, and that surprises him almost as much as Matt's announcement.

"Happy birthday, Adam."

Watching Matt's face soften into a fond, friendly smile, Adam doesn't feel small anymore. He and Matt are, by coincidence or otherwise, equals in this moment. Matt hadn't been worried about fitting in at his own birthday party, and that somehow makes Adam like him even more.

Throughout the night, Adam still doesn't do much, but the smile barely fades from his face, even as he catches some rude snickers as he descends back into the crowd.

*

Ten years, four singles, a Grammy nomination and a world tour later, Adam thinks back to those days, the days where it took some popular pretty boy acknwledging his presence to make him feel special, when now, he finally knows himself, has  _found_ himself. Matt had taught him a few things, mostly without knowing it, but none were as important as what he's learned in the past two years.

At the final Glam Nation show, Adam scans the people sitting in the first few rows, like he always does. It's how he starts off the show; gets himself grounded; meeting everyone's eyes, trying to personally connect with everyone if only for a moment. He nearly drops his microphone when he recognizes a face, front and center, right in the first row. He couldn't be missed.

Matt looks right back with that same confidence and power Adam himself shows the world, and Adam feels unusually breathless by the end of "Voodoo".

They catch up at the signing afterwards, and Adam is amazed to think of how little Matt has changed. He's gotten a little taller, a little broader, and he's grown a little bit of stubble, but that's about it. Then, Adam notices the biggest change: a wedding ring.

Adam signs some picture or something of the sort for Matt, and tells him that they can't just stand around and talk; other people are waiting. Nodding, Matt hands him a scrap of paper with seven scrawled digits, and says they should catch up sometime. Before he walks away, Matt says, "My daughter loves you."

Frozen in place, something leaves Adam's mouth in a rush of breath, something like _wow_ or _fuck_ or _what?_  as he flashes a wide, happy smile, eyes and teeth included, before Matt's face disappears into the darkness.

 


End file.
